I was with this coworker that I’ve always liked but her and I have just not been around each other much. Well we were talking about a recent ex coworker and how she was really good with our clients. She told me “Well you’re really good with them all too. I’ve seen the way you talk to them, firm but fair. You’re sweet to them. I think to myself, I need to be more like Laura.” I remember being new to the company and thinking the same thing about other staff there. I told myself I wanted to be looked at like that some day and it looks like that day is here. It was so sweet of her to say such nice things. Honestly though, I wouldn’t have gotten there without the help from my recently ex coworker. She taught me a lot. I will always be thankful for that. I’m not selling myself short. I know a lot of it is just natural and a lot of it is just from learning from my clients. I love that they have all let me be a part of their lives. They are the people I am most thankful for. They have taught me things nothing else could. Most of the time I would rather be with my clients than with friends. I really don’t like the politics of working at this place, but I for damn sure love working with my clients. When I say my clients I mean every client at my center. I firmly believe they are all, all of the staffs clients. I’ve been so upset over losing my coworker, even today. But I got a dose of why I got into to this field. I remembered why I love it, why I am really there. I got my appreciation back. This job has just completely changed the person I am, for the better.
“There’s that word again. Need. I need you. I need you to need me. How nauseating, to need another human being, as if their heart is in your throat. Love isn’t about need. Don’t romanticize the notion of desperation. Let me let you in on a secret: you don’t need me and I don’t need you. We can get through life just fine without each other. Love is not wanting to. We want each other, we want skin and hands and all our daily scars. We want intoxication and art museums and intertwined limbs. We want ferocity in our lips and slow, small circles traced on our stomachs. I don’t need you in my life, but goddamn I want you in it.”—All the Want in the World Cannot Fit in Our Hands (via typewriterdaily)